True Life: I’m A Hot Mess

R.I.P iPhone

My dear yellow 5c is nowhere to be found.

You know what’s funny? When Abies boss met me, he was surprised at my professional attitude.

“Honestly, I kinda pictured a hot mess”

BRUH, that’s how I’m feeling right now.

Last night was fun. I went to the Tiki Tabu Pop-Up at SIXTYLES and brought some of my Palm Beach friends. Wade was deejaying so I made a beeline for his booth and jumped up there with him.

After cheek kissing Sebastian Puga, I headed to the balcony for a cigarette. Some guy next to me started chatting me up and whatnot. He introduced me to his two friends. One of them happened to be Mr.Brainwash.

Mr.Brainwash works closely with Banksy and his art is blowing up. He’s extremely talented so it was an honor to meet him. With artists, you never know if they’re nice or straight up dicks. Luckily, he was very friendly and posed for a photo.


After an hour or so, my friends and I decided to go hit up Paul’s Baby Grand, one of my favorite spots. I had a couple drinks before I decided to call it quits and head back to Abies.

Ok so I’m just going to say this now: when I fall asleep when I’m drunk, I have very little consciousness if I’m woken up.

I fell asleep in the Uber.

The driver woke me and saw that I could barely stand and I was super groggy so he led me to the door and made sure I got in.

Before you preach about my wrecklessness, I rarely take Ubers alone when I’m drunk. Also, I always let someone know like my mom or Brandon. I’m not that dumb.

Anyways, I woke up to a hangover and no phone. My driver said that I had it in my hand as I went in but I don’t know if I believe him. I popped my Zoloft and took an ibuprofen.


Yeah, so I kind of ate Doritos for breakfast. And I may have made macaroni and cheese.

Okay, fine. I used my Doritos instead of a fork. Essentially, mac&cheese became my new favorite dip.

Holy shit, I am a hot mess.



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